Dear ____ (name covered to protect the guilty),
Here’s a little still life of the contents of your kitchen drawer collection of hoarded spoons and spatulas, none of which are necessary for microwaving your Lean Cuisine TV dinners and take out food. Please stop hoarding junk!
Dear Ms. Bouc,
Thank you ever so much for writing. I’m afraid I have no comment regarding Hill or chubby chicks… I mean it’s true a little heft never hurts but well, what I like even better than chubby chicks is bulky burgers. Yum!
W. J. Clinton
I was dreaming we were waltzing together and you were so sexy and charming. Then in my dream I remembered I’d gained 5 pounds and was afraid you might not be interested in me after all. But I remembered you and Monica Lewinsky—that chubby girl, you know. So maybe you like chubby women after all. Is it true Bill? Is that why you strayed? Was Hillary too skinny? Do you prefer chubby women?
The woman of your dreams (well, my dreams anyway…)
P.S. I take no responsibility for what happens in my dreams